Unlike burglars or muggers, computer criminals don't ever get killed on the spot if somebody catches them in the act. Instead, they have to wait to get beaten, raped or murdered later, when they end up behind bars with roommates “Bubba” and “Spike.”

We're not kidding. As U.S. Supreme Court Justice Harry A. Blackman wrote in Farmer v. Brennan, “The horrors experienced by many young inmates, particularly those who are convicted of nonviolent offenses, border on the unimaginable.” As one prisoner wrote, “I have been raped by up to 5 black men and two white men at a time. I've had knifes at my head and throat. I had fought and been beat so hard that I didn't ever think I'd see straight again…. I probably have AIDS now.”

For more, much more about prisoners getting raped by guards and other prisoners, see http://www.spr.org/

To learn about other horrors awaiting computer criminals, read Justin Peterson's story of his ordeal spending years behind bars for computer crime.

CONFUCIUS SAYS: “CRACKER WHO GETS BUSTED DOING ONE OF THESE CRIMES, WILL SPEND LONG TIME IN JAILHOUSE SOUP.”

Still want to commit computer crime? Better get a lawyer... and health insurance that will cover you while behind bars (We don't think they'll write a policy for that, though).